March 15, 2012
thecoachellavalleyartscene.com

thecoachellavalleyartscene.com

Let’s be honest, Monique doesn’t know quite how to organize things into neat piles of ten. What this means is she doesn’t know how to organize the things she has to do into something resembling a to-do list. Also, she just spent 2.5 hours taking a practice GMAT test and she failed miserably and quit before the third hour could set in. What does this mean for you? It means she’s going to find solace in comedy, like she always does, on Twitter. Twitter is like being blindfolded in a virtual hot tub with a bunch of cool people you don’t know. You’re not sure what they look like, but they’re always just sort of chewing the fat and sharing cool stuff with you.

So tonight Monique is dedicating this blog post to her all-time favorite tweets in a bucolic attempt to forget her past failures and join the circus. She follows comedians, friends, bloggers, comedians, writers, social media hotheads, comedians, web designers, musicians and Peter Shankman. She tried narrowing it down to less than 20 tweets but she has trouble letting go. If any of these tweets resonate with you, don’t wait. Follow them and join the virtual hot tub today.

Disclaimer: Monique understands she is probably the only one that finds 100% of these tweets funny/amazing/tasty as cherry cough syrup.

Drew Koshgarian

1. Drew Koshgarian: @MostlyPregnant This blonde cricket thinks it can walk over to me.

2. Joe Veix: @joeveix Your love is like a roller coaster, there’s a long line and everyone is throwing up.

3.  Laura Aime: @angelmeat Last night I dreamt that I was trying to find a cute dress to wear for the end of the world.

4. Robin McCauley: @RobinMcCauley Ask your doctor if dying is right for you.

5. Sean: @SeanBlazed Too many people should be in awesome warrior tribes and aren’t.

6. Kelly Oxford: @kellyoxfordWant to know the worst thing about yourself? Hang out with a kid for an hour, then ask them.

Braden Graeber

7. Braden Graeber @hipstermermaid I wish awkward accidental eye contact burnt more calories.

8. Jacqueline Carbajal: @jackiecarbajal Thank you channel 4 news for showing film footage of old people being blown away by the wind

9. Alec Sulkin: @thesulk Girl on Bachelor: “I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be or anyone else I’d rather be with.” How about NYC and Clooney.

10. Peter Shankman: @petershankman Don’t compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to you, yesterday.

11. Dane Cook: @danecook Asked a girl why she didn’t use her blinker while driving. She said blinkers are to “remind me to turn” & “I didn’t forget.”

12. Andy Richter: @Andy_Richter I’m a pretty tolerant guy, but if you try to give me one of those tissues with lotion in them I’ll kill your family.

Dane Cook

13. Brian Clark: @copyblogger The less seriously I take myself, the more I achieve.

14. MJ: @sucittaM I think I wasted my 15 minutes of fame trying to save money on car insurance.

15. Disneywords: @disneywords If I really lost him, the best friend I’ve ever known, how sad I’m gonna feel, looking through the woods alone. –Pooh

16. Andy Martindale: @AndyMartindale Adolf Hitler trending? Has he died?

17. TextsFromLastNight: @TFLN I legit just said “vaginal access denied” then told him his password hint was “tequila shots.”

18. Amber Tozer: @AmberTozer If you’re trying to eat a cantaloupe but you don’t have one, get your shit together.

19. Fran Gillespie: @FranGillespie Kony just got cast in the new Eddie Murphy movie to guarantee no one will find him.

20. Tim Siedell: @badbanana I honestly thought I’d have more Cub Scout badges by now.

 

 

 

Monique Muro

Monique is an exceedingly happy human from LA. She runs the blog A Novel Quest, and writes. A lot.

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