Marriages and novel writing have exactly 534,021 things in common, but for brevity’s sake, I’ll stick to my favorite: dedication. This relationship I have no problem dedicating to, because my novel will give me one thing in the end, as far as I’m concerned, and that is relief.

I’ve said more than a few ti`mes on this blog that writing is therapeutic for me. If I were writing to sell, I’d be up to my ears in rejection letters because it’d all be crap. That’s not to say that I’m not already up to my nose hairs in rejection letters of course, but you get the idea. When you think of it as a job, it comes out forced and smelling like month old milk. Sometimes though, when you’re writing for yourself, there are a few lines that might come out like a beautiful newborn, and you’re satisfied with them because they hit home. At least for you. Therein lies my own relief, because for that small measure of time when I wrote those few lines, I healed a bit.

Back to the matter at hand. Dedication. That is what novels require, and until now I have been spitting out excuse after excuse as to why I’m not dedicating myself to this relationship. Where real life relationships are concerned, I’ve got bruises and scars all over those hard to reach places, and I’m tired of wanting to be wanted. Real life people are never where you want them to be, when you want them to be. So maybe this move is selfish, but maybe it’s time to be. Sometimes the cure for loneliness is substituting whatever’s making you lonely with something that fills you up.

So I’m marrying my work.

I’ve decided to step into a new relationship with a man who I can spend as much time as I want with, who I can talk to at all hours of the night, who I can wake up with and dote upon. Essentially, someone who will always be there when I want him. Someone who will never let me down. Okay some of that is balderdash. I’ve been let down plenty by this novel fellow because sometimes he gets real quiet and it’s hard to get him to sing.

But he’s cute and on time, and I’m willing to make this work.

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Monique Muro

Monique is an exceedingly happy human from LA. She runs the blog A Novel Quest, and writes. A lot.

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