Holy Shit, I'm Speaking at My First Blog Panel

July 9, 2014

Holy Shit, I’m Speaking at My First Blog Panel

I’m speaking at my first blog panel on July 22nd, and the first way I’m keeping calm is through my sheer and utter excitement. Yes, for the first time in my life, nervous excitement feels amazing, and it’s like I’m standing at the edge of a tall building I’ve been itching to jump off of for months, and an unexpected stranger has finally agreed to give me a push.

You know how the universe is always telling you to feel grateful, to fake it till you make it, to always know that you’re in the right place at the right time, and that things are moving positively in your direction at all times? That’s almost always hard to believe, but sometimes it hits you over the head with a sack of feather pillows and says–well duh. Monday was crazy, but it was a day when I felt really proud of myself and grateful to have come this far with my blogging. I’d made some really great contacts with my last post about Pic Monkey, and something in the universe just felt so incredibly right. It was as though I’d been waiting for this day without really acknowledging that I was waiting for it. I expected it but I didn’t.

The second I got the text message about speaking on a blogging panel, I said ‘YES’ out loud before I even knew where it was, when it was, or what it was about. Speak? On a panel? About blogging? Sign me up!

For those of you who are a bit unfamiliar with this, it’s basically a set up where there is a moderator, an audience, and a few people on a panel who get asked a bunch of questions (I’m going to be part of those few people who get asked a bunch of questions). This particular panel is going to be on blogging, vlogging, and storytelling. From 7:30-8pm on July 22nd, me and another blogger are going to be asked questions about actionable advice on blogging, vlogging, and storytelling, to hopefully inspire all of the lovely attendees in attendance.

Here’s the invite link with all of the cool info about the event I’m speaking at:

http://www.eventbrite.com/e/blogs-vlogs-and-storytelling-a-panelworkshop-on-building-an-audience-tickets-12214302307

Now I knew what type of opportunity this was, so I instantly got all warm and shaky inside. There was a really intense burning sensation in my stomach and my heart beat hard. It took everything I had to scan my memory for anything that was previously scheduled for the evening of said blogger panel invite–July 22nd. That’s the moment when I realized I had purchased fucking Lady Gaga tickets for that night. Lady GAGA. Like, the Lady Gaga, live at Staples Center, the concert I’d been looking forward to since March.

But death is a hard teacher. I say that, because I immediately knew in that very moment that on my death bed, thinking back on my life, this was going to be one of those moments I would remember. Was this going to be a decision I was going to regret or look back on smiling? Was I going to turn down an opportunity to meet a dozen or so other lovely souls, and the opportunity to spotlight the very hobby I’ve worked so hard on, just so I could stand in a crowded concert watching someone else’s hobby in the spotlight? I think not. I’ve been needing to find my stage, and the universe delivered. I would a hundred times put myself in an uncomfortable situation if I thought it meant doing something cool. And this is so fucking cool.

So it is with amazing gratitude and awe, that I share with you this wonderful first. And I hope it’s the beginning of more wonderful firsts, more wonderful opportunities to step gracefully into discomfort. Or ungracefully. Whatever gets remembered. And I wholeheartedly pray that I remember that we are all human, and that we truly know nothing about what other people think. I pray to the Gods in the Game of Thrones that they will allow me to think before I speak, to bite size all of my advice so it is digestible and/or at the very least tweetable, and that I come out feeling like I made some kind of sense, and hopefully a positive impression.

Is it horrible that I’m already planning the post I intend to write after it’s all said and done? I am nothing if not a stack of experiences on digital paper. My mind works at warp speed and I’ve got about 15 posts piled up for each month of the year with loads and loads of shit I want to write about. I want to give you guys more stuff, I want to get to know you guys better, I want to blog better, I want to learn more and write more fiction and read more fiction and figure out what the hell I’m doing on this beautiful blue, brown, and green earth. Did you know a fly rested on my hand today and I loved it? It’s so nice to be in harmony with the world sometimes.

That was probably about the most scattered paragraph ever in the history of paragraphs, but I’m scatter brained thinking about this opportunity. My goal for this event is to be myself, and to smile a lot. And to look forward to this like I look forward to egg nog brandys and tree lights during christmas. I can’t wait to tell you all about it.

And oh yeah, I’m still able to go to the concert–I was able to swap out my tickets for a different night. The universe is kind and just.

And as for you, 2014. You’re such a colorful, slippery love-mess.