Day to Day Archives - A Novel Quest

Before I launch into this almost really terrible thing, I want to announce that the winner of the $25 Amazon gift card giveaway is Katie Weinhold! Thanks Katie for participating

I’ve emailed you!

Also a note on that. Did you know 82 people participated in that giveaway? With a whopping total of 377 entries! I couldn’t believe the turn out. I’m jumping for joy while sitting and typing and drinking an ice cold Fat Tire. But literally, jumping for joy. I got a few new subscribers too! So if you’ve just subscribed, it’s awesome to meet you, and just wait. You’ve got more opportunities to win gifts coming in the new year.

That’s what I said today, as I walked into my bathroom. But let’s back up to Friday, because I really want to talk about this restaurant Casa Sanchez.

I’ve been writing in coffee shops lately because there’s a ghost in my apartment.

No, I haven’t really been able to prove it, but every so often some small thing will be out of place, or some small noise will come from the dark that shouldn’t. Some of this stuff is pretty minor and weird, but the other night I was dead asleep and suddenly the buttons on my microwave started beeping. A few nights later it happened again while I was writing. I had a firm talk with it (the microwave of course), but that seemed to make it more difficult to clear whatever buttons were being pushed by some seemingly harmless entity.

But ever since, I’ve been a bit shaken up. I think it will get better with time. It only seems to be happening in the kitchen area, which is good because that’s not where I sleep. However the kitchen area just so happens to be right by the bathroom area, so it makes it difficult to creep into the bathroom to do things like brush my teeth and pee, because I’m always so nervous something bizarre is going to happen.

Fear is an interesting thing. It’s a choice. But what gets me thinking about this situation is my upbringing, which let’s face it, was always filled with monsters and traumatizingly scary movies. Not to mention how obsessed my mom’s side of the family seems to be with anything paranormal. All of this factored into it really makes for a horrific experience with what seems like a very innocent little ghost. Also a large part of me feels like my imagination is making it far worse than it really is. I don’t know for certain whether or not there is something paranormal there, but I know weird things have happened and that I live in a super old building. Which means everything from a creak to a horn honking outside makes my heart stop and then race with all kinds of scenarios of me being dragged out of bed and/or possessed or pushed or whispered to.

I should remember my line therapy. I should also remember what my dad always used to say, that it’s all in my head. I do love living on my own but this fear over the past few days has been seriously crippling. I won’t get out of bed to pee or brush my teeth or take my contacts out. I won’t go home after work, I won’t sleep, it’s bad. And what makes the entire thing worse is that I can’t work. I can’t read, I can’t go on the computer, nothing. Crippling fear. And it all started with the damn microwave beeping! Before that I was slightly aware that it could be haunted but it didn’t bother me as much. Now with this whole beeping thing, it’s shaken me up bad.

I think the best solution is to remember that I am never alone, that I am grateful to have a place of my own to bunker down in, and that love is my resistance to anything frightening. I always relax when I remember love. Maybe that is because it’s more powerful than fear.

Now while this strange fear has kept me from being productive at home, I will admit it’s made me 10 times more productive in coffee shops. Since I go to coffee shops to write after work, it’s easier to actually get work done versus doing it at home and being distracted by everything. So by that I mean I’m half way done with my e-book! The one I mentioned last post that I’m going to be giving away as a reward to new subscribers. It’s going to be called “Adult Toys: For Bloggers, Writers, and Wanna-be Entrepreneurs.” I’m going to make it as attention-grabbing as possible, because I know what you’re thinking already you dirty thinkers! But I’m using dirty minds to my benefit. If it shocks and attracts people, then that’s my goal. I’m taking George Lois’s advice on this one.

“Advertising should grab you by the throat, should choke you, your eyes should water, your heart should race, and you should almost pass out. ”

Bear in mind I don’t want you to pass out, but I know that anyone who creates anything these days has to make it something people will never forget. And I’m in the market for creating unforgettable stuff. You’ll probably forget what the e-book was about, or even who the writer was, but you probably won’t forget the title. Or the front cover. Which I’m trying to figure out what I want to be. Something risqué in a crazy blogger, writer, and wanna-be entrepreneur kind of way.

I haven’t blogged in awhile. It’s because I lost a subscriber. When I lose a subscriber, I get in this weird funk for about a week. It’s not that I don’t want to blog, but I feel afraid to because I feel like something I’m doing isn’t right.

After about a week I get over it. This must be what it feels like when writers get bad reviews on their books. They feel eh about the whole thing for a bit. They go back to binge-watching Dexter on Netflix, and they go back to their dark chocolate peanut butter cups from Trader Joes. Then a week passes and they go back to writing anyway because nothing else gives them the same feeling. Nothing else fills them up. So without question, without even thinking about it, they’re back on their laptops, typing away.

Oh yeah. HAPPY THANKSGIVING! I’m in bed right now and my room is a mess. There’s a foam roller in the middle of the floor, jewelry on the desk, spilling out of its box, and a lot, I mean A LOT of clothes lying around the room.But I’m happy it’s Thanksgiving, and I’m happy I get to spend some time with my family, gossiping about celebrities and the crazy people in our lives.

This also means that Christmas is officially here, meaning the budgeting can finally begin. I honestly have not even started my shopping. I always say I’ll start early but I never feel like it. Today I’m going to make a list of everything and get moving.

I’m also going to be listing some cool stuff in the sidebar of my blog in case you want to do some holiday shopping on Black Friday or Cyber Monday. I’m an affiliate for Mod Cloth, a super cute online store that sells dresses, office/apartment decorations, and a bunch of other awesome vintage stuff I can’t afford, which means I’ve got the inside scoop on all the sales their having. They’re giving 50% off on a metric shit ton of stuff, but I’m more obsessed with stuff for my apartment. Luckily ModCloth is doing an excellent job at catering to this obsession. I mean who wouldn’t want a bird door mat?

Alright. I’m late to Thanksgiving. I really hope you guys have an awesome day, and if you’re into the whole Black Friday madness…good luck to you!

I took a sleeping pill last night because lately I haven’t been able to fall asleep until 230am or so (blame Dexter). When I woke up this morning I felt drowsy, but really relaxed. It was a strange feeling. Some negative feeling was missing, but I couldn’t pin point which one.

While still in my curious fog on the way to work this morning, I switched lanes on Venice blvd, and saw that the approaching car I moved in front of started tailing me big time, riding really close to my bumper, a way of letting me know I was going too slow and he was pissed. Now before I go on, let’s make two things clear: one, we were approaching a stop light, so I wasn’t speeding up for good reason, and two, when I ‘cut’ in front of him, he was a pretty decent distance away. He must have been going pretty fast because he caught up to me pretty quick. I guess the speed limit I was going was too slow for his taste.

When we got to the stoplight, he got in the left hand turn lane and pulled up next to me. He rolled down his window and said, “The next time you jump out in front of someone you should go a little faster. Life is too precious, my dear.”

Still in my sleeping-pill addled fog, I could do nothing but stare at him. He rolled up his window and inched forward before I could birth any kind of response.

As usually happens in these situations, I thought of something to say about a minute after it happened. I should have said, “If life is so precious my dear, you should have been going a little slower.”

This was the first piece of unwanted advice I was given today. Go a little faster when cutting in front of people. The world has its way of saying hello.

Later, I was at the gym after work and was approached by one of the trainers. Actually two trainers. One that walked up to me, and one that just so happened to be using the elliptical machine next to mine.

The one on the elliptical pipes up with, “It looks like they’re going inward because they’re overcompensating for something. Your knees are collapsing, and with gradual wear and tear they’ll get worse over time.”

I’m sure this was all said with the best intentions, but I wasn’t in any pain, and I felt great. They started in on how I needed to stretch my abductors and do some ‘Jane Fonda side leg lifts’. They said it could be my shoes.

“Well how do I fix this now? Should I be doing this machine with my knees facing more forward?”

They didn’t really have any answers, except the whole hip stretch thing, and then a follow up with “when can you come in?” which I took to mean they wanted me to pay for a personal training session to fix my apparently inward, collapsing knees. I made up some BS about how I don’t usually go there, and that I would work on my stretches and thanks for the advice!

I already know my knees have issues. Probably from all of the running I used to do. Which is why I was at the gym using the machines that aren’t so hard on my knees. Now you’re telling me I’m fucking up my knees on the very machines I thought they would be okay on?

I love my life. This unwanted advice was probably useful (I do appreciate the knee comments, really), but I could have done without it. Since I’m human and always learning/growing/complaining/trying to figure things out, my brain automatically started trying to figure out what the best way for me to handle this advice was. Should I take it? Should I ignore it? Should I try and find the good? Should I let it bug me?

I’m tired of trying to figure out how I’m supposed to handle situations. Sometimes I think blogging about them is the only way to hash it all out in my head. What’s your advice?

Every Monday and Friday morning, at roughly 6:30am-ish, the trash men come and roll a large dumpster up and down the alley next to my apartment. As I’m only one floor up sleeping next to a window I can’t quite close all the way, there is no sleeping through it.

As the huge brown dumpster rolls over the bumpy gravel, pushed by men who possess a courage unmatched by anyone in LA at that ungodly hour, it makes the sound of pure, unadulterated thunder. In fact if I were a sleeping cloud, and thunder were to strike right through my cloudy soul and collide with all that is metal everywhere, that would only slightly encapsulate the sound of this rolling trash dumpster through my alley twice a week.

I swear to everything that is cheesy and greasy, it sounds like the world is collapsing in on itself when this happens. It gives me shivers. And the days that it happens are too fitting to not be ordained by some higher power. Mondays and Fridays. Every Monday it’s like a harsh wake up call reminding me that hey! It’s Monday! SUCKERRRR!! And every Friday it sort of becomes this hey! One last time! SUCKERRR!!! before letting me slip into deep, and I mean deep weekend bliss.

I woke up this morning with the first line of this blog post in my head, only Meg Ryan was saying it. (Ah, morning disorientation). So that’s sort of the reason I’m blogging about this tonight. I just like the way things hit me when I wake up, and I like writing about nuances in the day. I’m 28 and I want to remember my nuances. And waking up is the most magical thing. It combines everything that was going on in your unconscious state of mind with the present one, and you’re left groggy and a bit disoriented, wondering which way is up. It’s like when I woke up around 230am last night after dreaming about a wonderful service I’d invented, where people could upload their Instagram photos into this like…storyline they put together. It was like a place where you could upload pictures and quotes that told a story about your weekend, your trip to Idaho, whatever, and they could share it with their friends.

When I woke up of course I realized this idea was a lot like Storify, but it didn’t matter. I wasn’t about to pursue it. In the dream it was just really, really cool.

Oh yeah, wanted to update you on a new weird thing on the blog. There’s a video in the sidebar to the right. It’s part of a video ad network I joined called Van. It posts fun little viral videos from around the web for your enjoyment, and I get a few cents every time someone watches them. You don’t have to, but it’s there because it’s a relatively simple way for bloggers like me and millions of others to make a buck or two and it doesn’t bother anyone. So if you’re casually reading and get bored half way through any post, feel free to stop and have yourself a quick intermission.

And I haven’t forgotten about the giveaways. I always think about them actually. Sometimes I’m in the shower and I’m like damn, what do I give these guys? And then other times I’m in the street and I’m like damn, what do I give these guys? And then usually I’m online joining a bunch of different communities to see what opportunities are out there. And there are actually so many cool communities for bloggers to join to get sponsors (these are the people who approach bloggers with their products, so the bloggers can then give them away to their readers. AKA you.) One of them is Etsy. (Don’t roll your eyes boys). There’s actually a lot of great products on Etsy that cater to both men and women. I joined a Blogger/Sponsor Connection team there, where a lot of people are looking for bloggers to promote their shiz. It’s really interesting. So needless to say, I’m workin on hookin’ ya’ll up! Hopefully I can get to a point where I’m doing one giveaway a week.

Also? I’m thinking of making it so subscribers can read the entire blog post in their email accounts, instead of having to click and open it elsewhere. Why? Because everyone is consuming content on their cell phones, and no one wants to click out of their email account when they’re on their cell phones. Myself included. So if you’re reading this in your email account currently, and wondering what the hell is going on, that’s it. (If you hate this idea, let me know in the comments.)

Also I really hope your Monday went well. Whatever it is you did with it, and whatever your plans are for the week, I hope they are fun and only partially scary. Lastly, it seems that everyone carved a freakin’ pumpkin this past weekend. I feel left out. I need to carve a pumpkin. Did you carve a pumpkin? And what in Jack’s name are you going to be for Halloween?

I am so damn excited for October. Halloween haunts, leaves everywhere, dressing up as someone you’re not, and drinking all the pumpkin ale you can get your hands on. Tomorrow night I’m going to an interactive horror theater called the Masque of Mortality. It’s supposedly not your average Halloween haunt jaunt. It’s actually a play, but you walk through various parts of the theater to experience each scene. These kind of things really get me all spooked up, and somehow warm and happy on the inside.

On that note, I still have no idea what I’m going to be for Halloween. Last year I went as Google Chrome, quite the awesome costume if you ask me, but this year I’m thinking of cruising by the Spirit Halloween store they’re opening up the street from me and scoping out their stash, even though I really have no firm plans for the holiday. Worst case scenario I dress up and drink pumpkin ale at home, under the covers in front of The Exorcist.

Today was pretty awesome. I was busy at work, and on my lunch I found a BUNCH of cool sites/blogs that are going to be great resources for that side website project I’m working on. Sometimes when I think about the journey that side project is going to be, I start wigging out. It’s a website, after all, and it needs content, security, promotion, and above all, an audience. Those things are hard to come by without the necessary tools and dedication. I get overwhelmed by it all, but only when I think about it in the future. It’s a good thing the future hasn’t happened yet. The only thing that’s happening right now is right now, the clickity clackety of keyboard keys on this blog, and the finishing touches on the site by my web developer.

YES! THE FINISHING TOUCHES! I’m only hours away from a finished website. Mine. That was professionally developed. I can’t wait to fill it with content! I’ve put up about 5 articles already, so I need to work on a few more, and eventually find some contributors. I have no idea where I’m going, but I really am having so much fun.

It’s funny how this one accomplishment is really inspiring me to tackle so much more. I found this web designer that I really want to hire to re-do this blog. Before, hiring a designer sounded so formidable, but lately awesome and affordable web designers have sort of been falling into my lap, and I feel much more equipped to handle the process. And as much as I do sort of like the layout of this blog, I really think it could use a bit of polish.

Also, how are YOU? I was thinking how much I love that you read this blog and wanted to reward you. I got an email today from another blog I subscribe to, where the blogger was giving away a book and some other prizes, and I thought shit, I want to give stuff to my readers too. What do you think? Any ideas on what you might want? I could do like a weekly or monthly giveaway of some sort. Movies? Jewelry? Starbucks gift cards? You think about it and get back to me. Let’s do fun stuff.

Think about how you feel on the weekends, and how the tightness everywhere in your body softens when you do. It’s like taking off a tight t-shirt, or pants that you’ve somehow squeezed into. It’s relaxing. Every time I think about the weekend, I feel a subtle release in my stomach and chest. It’s as though someone has taken their grip off of my stomach and said ‘relax’, and I realize there is no reason I can’t feel like this every single day of my life.

Last week I experimented with this. At least one time every day, I closed my eyes, and told myself it was the weekend. I felt that subtle release in my stomach and chest, and it felt wonderful. When I got to work, I pretended that the office was a large apartment and all of my coworkers were my roommates. I pretended we were all just working on our favorite things, and that whatever everyone else was doing, was something they all wanted to be doing, and came here to do. I pretended that we were all slobs, slaving away at our passions in our pajamas, with no responsibilities to do anything we didn’t want to do. That we could just sit in our rooms and not give a single living fuck.

This was hard. It was hard because we have been wired since God knows when to separate work from fun, weekdays from weekends, and colleagues from friends. We have been trained to think of Mondays as shit, and to be so completely depressed when the weekend is over. And it takes so much effort to see the weekday as something other than what it is, because everyone looks at it the same way. It’s almost like you are an outsider, and a crazy one at that. But believe me when I say that you can walk around like every day is the weekend, because no one can do shit about it. No matter what people say to you, they will never be able to touch what lies within you. They will never, ever, be able to reach down and physically stick their fingers down your throat and into your soul, if that’s even where it resides, and make you think or feel anything you don’t want to think or feel.

But yes, it is hard. During my experiment, I want to say that only about twice a day was I able to 100% relax as though it were the weekend, and those two times a day lasted about 30 seconds each. It was extremely difficult, because you can’t just stop thinking a certain way in the span of a single week. It’s like, you can’t just run a marathon by training for a few days. It’s a process. You have to work your way up to it. You have to run a mile or two every day, or every other day, until you build up the strength to run 26 of them. So you know what? You have to think like it’s the weekend two times a day, for 30 seconds each, until you can live out the whole day like it’s the weekend, or the whole week for that matter. And you have to literally exert a metric shit ton of effort to think this way, but the best part about this kind of effort is that it’s not tiring. I’ll tell you what’s tiring, thinking Monday is shit every week, because you have to work and you don’t get to do what you want. That’s fucking tiring. What’s not tiring is the weekend, and there is absolutely no reason you can’t feel like you do on the weekend during the week. It’s you that’s preventing yourself from thinking that it’s all one long Saturday, because people tell you it’s not, and they are tired.

Don’t listen to tired people. Listen to yourself. If you say it’s Saturday, it’s fucking Saturday. If you want to think for one second that this is crazy talk, just remember that someone was responsible for creating Mondays, someone with a heart, lungs, elbows, and knee caps. Someone just like you. So if it was just another simple human that created these Mondays, and these stupid feelings about them, then you can be another simple human and uncreate them just as easily. Someone made up the bad feelings that you have, but there’s no real estate for made up feelings in your heart and mind. And pretty soon you start feeling sorry for everyone that hates Monday, because they are doing what they’re told, and that’s never any fun.

I’D LOVE TO…